DAY 11

I dedicate the first four hours to getting ahead of emails - several of those entering the Great Karaoke Hunt are naming venues not in the listings, so it takes time to check out these new venues and list them. Then out into the sunshine for a walk in Glenelg, almost blown off the pier by the fierce wind, then off to find some food.

I incorrectly interpret the Glenelg cafe 'All Day Breakfasts' sign, and wait almost all day for the plate to arrive - when it does, the lady pointedly remarks 'that's a really full plate.' I bite my tongue - how clever of them to serve breakfast on a saucer and charge $9.95. 'The coffee's free' she says. 'No' I decide to correct her, 'you mean it's included in the price'. She's not impressed. Nor am I - the breakfast was called 'gourmet' because it was to be served with mushrooms. 'Mushrooms are off, sorry' says a man sent especially to advise me, nearly 25 minutes after I ordered - and he didn't look a bit like Basil Fawlty.

But Glenelg is a really nice litle shopping area, and I'm getting to rather like Adelaide. It's a small city, and thus easy to navigate, but large enough to contain all the karaoke that you might desire. Last night's Royal Hotel at Torrensville was great, and I now feel ready to test some other, and perhaps lesser, venues.

I go back to the hotel and get in a couple more hours of emails. Nearly up to date. Then out in the early evening chasing down some karaoke - even though this is Sunday, I'm able to call and confirm several places.

The Portland Hotel at Port Adelaide is on the side of a busy road. It's a bit rundown, just the sort of place I like, but the 10 patrons are wedged in seats and looking bored. The sound is nicely loud, but with so much top-end that it hurts. The monitor is on the console at an angle, and there's a foldback speaker.

I see a lady being served a meal, so I decide to try. 'Sorry' says the guy behind the bar, speaking slowly so the clock will tick over the 30 mark - food finishes at 8:30. Yeah, they deserve their pitiful crowd.

The songbook looks like it's a decent list, but I'd have to go and ask the host if I want one, so I'm tempted not to bother - especially if they can't be bothered putting them out on the tables in order to encourage people (the good hosts always do this). The two singers are not great (I'm being kind here), and who cares because we're watching the touching family scene of a young boy wandering around the console whilst his Mum (I presume) hosts. All very 'family', and all very acceptable if you're not running a professional outfit or intending to entertain more than a dozen or so regulars, but when hosting karaoke is your business, and you're seeking to attract new people to get up and sing, this is just not the way it's achieved. But then I wonder whether I'm been a bit unfair, because this is a pretty quiet and industrial area of town, and I'd be surprised if there would be many karaoke devotees living around the area. I decide I'm not being unfair, that the patronage is deservedly small, and I finish my beer and leave.

The alternative, the Lakes Resort, takes a bit of finding, particularly because I imagine it will be on a major road but instead find it on a very small road that looks as though I'm heading into a residential area. But the venue turns out to be a nice modern building, and there is a crowd when I walk in.

The host is well dressed, and the sound is good. There's a girl by the host's side who is running the console, whilst he sits at a high round table, accepts requests, and welcomes singers. People are friendly, even welcoming - by which I mean that they're happy to talk. This feels like a really relaxed place - and from the number of seriously elderly patrons I think it must be quite close to a retirement home. I feel right at home.

It's a bit dificult to tell whether there are many singers, so I find a songbook and choose something gentle so as not to frighten the older ones, and my wait to sing is quite short. The singer occupies a corner position in the room, and the sound from the foldback is loud - I hope the balance for the audience is as good. The song seems appropriately gentle and slow, though being from the 1970s may be a touch modern, and I decide that the hosts know what they're doing with their system. The applause is polite, and I decide that's enough to allow me to wander and chat.

I chat to a young mother whose twelve year old daughter sings, actually quite well, then I chat to a young couple who tell me all about the karaoke in the area. This really is a very friendly place, and I'm glad that I found it - it has everything that the previous venue was lacking.

A good night - then home. Tomorrow, I'm going to track down Kath & Randy at Adelaide's Karaoke Light & Sound in Daw Park.

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